Life seems empty and meaningless! What to do?

It seems to me that you need to make life meaningful, get married, have children ... or if you are not ready to take such a step, go on vacation to another country, relax both in body and soul, think about what you would like to get from life, what you would like to do … Get rid of depression. Good luck to you!

I think in this problem it is worth distracting from everyday life, from daily problems ... If there is an opportunity to go somewhere to relax and try not to think about anything, but live today and enjoy life. Then, when you're ready, think things over carefully, find solutions to the problems you're facing, and take things easy. Remember: there are no hopeless situations - there are situations with unpleasant decisions, but there is always a way out!

unfortunately, sports, travel, having children, etc. are just some distraction from the problem, the problem is inside, professional psychologists can take a course that will help you find the meaning of life and get rid of a depressive illness of the soul, only a psychologist will help!

And you can really get distracted by reading books, visiting various courses, sports, women, children ...

Try to spend more time not at home, but with friends or relatives. If possible, take a break somewhere. Usually, after a change of scenery, a person begins to think differently. Go often to those places where you feel good and have fun. Whether it's a movie, a cafe, night club. Also from bad or negative thoughts meditation helps. It is enough to completely relax and listen to this or that meditation once a day and you will begin to feel better, you will be inspired. It is important to choose one or another meditation, so to speak, to find your own.

Boredom gives birth to death, and interest gives birth to life - so says one of the leading business coaches in Russia, Vlad Akishev. So, you need to be interested in something. If you are bored and don’t see the point, it means that you have tried everything that you have already done, you have become uninteresting. Do something you haven’t tried - go on a trip, skydive, make love to a stranger, just buy sweets for the kids in the garden or orphanage with your last money ... You can think of anything. The unknown will cause excitement, interest. You will be able to revise your worldview, principles, stereotypes, change your thinking and a spark will appear in you that will make you go forward, live and enjoy life.

I’ll tell you one thing, let’s stop putting such thoughts into your head, it won’t lead to good, find the person with whom you are most pleased to communicate, find a business, an occupation that once attracted you and you abandoned it, develop physically it will definitely give you confidence))

Each person is individual. He must independently determine the meaning of his life, and not wait until someone else tells him how and why to live. Therefore, only one thing can be advised: take your head in your hands and think, think, think. Since you exist in this Universe, it means that you need it for something. Not a single living being is created for the senseless expectation of its death. It should bring some benefit - this is the meaning of life. Imagine that several billion people are sitting on their sofas, doing nothing and only repeating: we do not know what we live for. Would you like to be in their company? It is also unpleasant for others when you declare to them: I don’t know what I live for. The meaning of life is to benefit others, everyone can do it. The one who does not find his own meaning of life does not want to obey this objective law, he wants to live only for himself, but there is no meaning of life on this path.

If there are children, then for them! And so love paints our life! you can go on a trip in a trailer or to some city you need to tell more interesting things in life !!

I understand you very well. I have these thoughts now. They tell me to do something, and I answer - what's the point? Then they answer me that the meaning is in the search for meaning or simply in living.

And that's how you want to relax and lie down at the very bottom. When there is simply nowhere to fall further. And you start to float. I had it. But only with each time the bottom is deeper and deeper. One day you may never get up.

It started for me after my self-confidence broke down. I had such a belief that if you really really want, everything can be achieved. And the first obstacle that could not be broken broke me.

But on the other hand, it must be said that this melancholy is more characteristic of a Russian person than others. This is from idleness and also from inner emptiness. We're Christians. We must believe in salvation and the Hereafter. And then everything is not in vain. You have to fight and save yourself. To later...

I know this, but I'm just saying.

It seems to me that I had a few happy years, and then it was taken away. And the world has changed. Feeling like we are going downhill. Protection and hope were taken away. It became cloudy and scary. Premonition of something. Close your eyes and don't want to open.

You can go to a psychologist, but he is designed to treat the mind, not the soul. And the reason is in the soul. The neuropathologist will prescribe pills, but will say that something needs to be changed in life. But there is no strength, no desire.

I wish you good luck and that the gloomy streak ends and the white one comes.

Many of us face situations like this sooner or later. What to do? One way to overcome the period is active rest. Try signing up for Gym. Physical activity is the best way to get rid of sad thoughts and make you think about the meaning of life. It is also worth trying hiking, climbing, etc. All sports will firstly raise your vitality, and secondly, they will give you a lot of new and interesting acquaintances.

This is autumn and loneliness, there is no strength to look at the dull weather and no one is shaking nearby. You can start something on your own when the race to the bottom begins. You can give away all the property, leave the apartment in reserve and leave with a hundred rubles to a foreign city. Then, when there is nothing to eat, there will immediately be the meaning of life and something to live for.

Or love someone. At least for the sake of diversity in this life, try to see if there is enough intelligence, patience, cunning to captivate someone so that they cannot live without you. And then you might get carried away. Treat life like a game. When it seems that at any moment you can stop and turn back. Have a little fun in life.

Somehow I was suggested such a way out of a similar situation. Just lie down and do nothing. Lie as long as your body requires. Don't push him. It could be a day, a week...

Then a person gets tired of inaction and idleness. First, thoughts, dreams, ideas are born. Then there is an irresistible craving to carry out what you have thought up.

Reread The Little Prince. Each person lives on his own planet. Everyone is engaged on his personal planet in what he likes or what he is accustomed to or adapted to.

Read how the Little Prince got up every morning… Did he have huge goals? Or some special meaning in his ordinary life?

He got up to put things in order on the planet, otherwise trouble could happen to it ... In his case, the planet would be torn apart by baobabs. In our life, we will simply wallow in chaos and dirt.

What is special about the other inhabitants of the planets that Exupery describes?

He describes us, people, each with his own world, that is, each on his own planet.

The most important thing for you now is not to fall into despair. Relive this moment.

Surely there are people who need you and who love you.

Don't look for the meaning of life. The point is simply to have the strength to live. Live as you can, as you can. Better with pleasure and to the maximum.

Fill the void with only what you like. So much more fun in life.

First, do some math. On one piece of paper, write 1,2,3, etc., what bothers and dislikes you in your life. On 2 pieces of paper, that in your life there is still something that you like or just suits you. To say that everything is bad is an emotion. If you focus, you get a big list of both. On sheet 3, write what needs to be done to reduce the negative points, i.e. some plan. Let it be unrealistic at first glance, write everything there from the smallest details to grandiose plans. It can be from some calls, sort out cosmetics and throw away unnecessary things to the same dances, etc. that you are advised. Done, crossed out from the list, remembered something new, sign. Put it on the table and refer to it more than once a day. You will be surprised how it works! Good luck!

This happens not only from boredom, but also from the absence of problems. When there is nothing to worry about, there is a void that needs to be filled with something. Well, if there is a worthy occupation that loads the brain and hands.

By the way, it can appear by itself, almost out of nowhere.

Mysteriously, immediately after boredom comes a lot of busyness, when it’s very bad - there is light at the end of the tunnel, when it’s great - some problems arise. In this way, nature restores balance. So wait, something will happen.))

If you don't want surprises, it's best to start on your own. Take a look around - maybe someone needs help, and physically.

The best shake-up is to become a volunteer and go to nursing homes, orphanages, hospices. Your life will immediately become full and desirable.

It happens to every person. I would recommend learning new profession, or skill, take some language courses. As for children, love for others is purely your business, but then where will you put them? Improve yourself, there is no limit. And you still need to drink a course of good vitamins.

Usually this phenomenon occurs from boredom and nothing to do. Keep yourself busy. In depression, exercise helps a lot. Especially active sports: swimming, dancing, running. If this is not enough, then try to occupy all your free time. Work or study during the day, sports in the evening. On weekends, you can do your favorite hobby, if you have one. You can go to some useful courses, where you will develop and communicate. Try not to have time to be sad and think about the meaning of your life.

It is necessary to communicate with those who are now worse off than you. This is for starters.

can have a baby? this is the main meaning in my life ... but you can fill your life with love for others and help those in need - when you help, you feel happy ..

Well ... how-how ... you need to learn how to fill it with meaning. And to begin to understand the meaning of life in general. It just seems that the meaning of life is a completely incomprehensible thing. It is enough to observe life, not only human, and everything becomes clear. The meaning of life is to LIVE! Happy and comfortable living. Search and find ways to live better and better. Everything that exists, whatever it does, acts according to this meaning. What's worse than a person?

Growing up, we learn the rules of behavior in society, as well as adopt from our parents their attitude towards “bad” character traits. As a result, the effect of the “forbidden fruit” is created, the attractiveness of which is not always resisted, the violation of the rules causes a feeling of shame and has a devastating effect on the integrity of the individual.

In greeting cards and poems, a wish is traditionally found happy life. Even if the words are not a tribute to politeness, but sound absolutely sincere, not everyone and not always can explain what will be happiness for a particular person. The traditional "hard-working husband, obedient children, house-full bowl"? Life shows that not everything is so simple.

History from life

Here is a typical example: Ira is an ordinary girl "from a good family." She graduated with honors from school and entered the institute recommended by her parents for a prestigious specialty in economics. After high school, under the patronage of her father, she got a job in a bank. Then a husband appeared, who received the full approval of his parents as a "promising businessman", children were born.

Twenty years later, Irina Ivanovna occupies a certain position, her husband owns a business that brings not sky-high, but stable income. An apartment, a car, a vacation abroad, children are placed in prestigious universities.

Here it is - happiness, but ... For some reason, life seems meaningless! Children live separately and do not often indulge in visits. I would like to spend my free time with my husband, but he is busy with business, and common themes there is less and less to talk about. The career ladder has reached the “ceiling”, the work is boring, monotonous and you want to quit, but what will your colleagues, friends, parents think?

It was after the thought “what would dad, who got me into this bank, think if I take it and quit”, Irina began to understand that something was wrong with her life. I began to remember that at school I even crammed unloved subjects "perfectly well" so as not to upset my parents. The profession of an economist always seemed boring, but my mother insisted that it was financial and prestigious.

My dad introduced me to my future husband. Of course, then she was young and stupid, and her parents were wise and wished only the best for her, and she is very grateful to them, but her parents also instilled the habit of looking back at the opinions of others. They created a certain pattern, from which she was then afraid to retreat all her life, so that something terrible and irreparable would happen. She even chose a car not to her taste, but one that "will correspond to the status of a leading economist."

But the most important question came later: “what to do now?”… How to understand what in her life is dictated by the desire to meet the expectations and stereotypes of others, and what is real, what she herself really is, what does she want and what then is the meaning and happiness in life?

"True" and "False" Self

Irina's story is quite typical, not only for our country, but for the whole world. Moreover, psychologists have long and comprehensively studied the versatility of human nature.

Carl Jung has a theory of the "shadow" personality, which includes primitive, socially condemned character traits. Greed, envy, jealousy, anger, selfishness, eroticism, lust for power - all this is customary to deny, to fear, to get rid of in oneself. However, these traits are an integral part of human nature and, according to Jung, can either be found with your “shadow” mutual language or become its victim.

No less famous psychologist E. Erickson is in full agreement with his Swiss colleague and puts forward the theory of "identity crisis". According to her, "dark" aspirations are inherent in people by nature, they attract, but also frighten at the same time.

Growing up, we learn the rules of behavior in society, as well as adopt from our parents their attitude towards “bad” character traits. As a result, the effect of the “forbidden fruit” is created, the attractiveness of which is not always resisted, the violation of the rules causes a feeling of shame and has a devastating effect on the integrity of the individual.

But perhaps the most understandable and detailed explanation of the "true" and "false" Self is given by the British pediatrician and psychoanalyst D. Winnicott. He came to the conclusion that from birth, a person at the level of unconditioned reflexes forms a defense against environment(including on the psychological plane) in the form of a reaction to a potential threat to comfort and well-being.

In children, it looks like this: if the basic needs of the child are not perceived by the parents, he concludes that they are not significant. And here comes the first substitution of concepts. Trying to get the attention of people on whom he depends, the child learns to perceive their desires and try to comply with them, suppressing his natural desires.

It seems to him that inconsistency with the idea of ​​parents about themselves is a threat to their own well-being. Disappointing mom and dad means losing their love and care. Considering that adults often seek to fulfill themselves at the expense of children (I could not, so let my son become a great hockey player), emotional lies only accumulate, instilling the habit of hiding one's “true” Self.

The instinct of self-defense is transformed into a "false" Self, which over time is able to completely isolate the "true" Self not only from others, but also from the wearer himself. As a result, the sense of one's own identity begins to blur. This is exactly what happened to our heroine. At some point, she could no longer deceive herself and realized that she needed to do something with her life so as not to lose herself.

Return of authenticity

It should be noted that a person most clearly experiences the acquisition of individual identity in adolescence.age e (youthful maximalism), which does not mean at all that the “shadow” I will not be able to declare itself at any period of life (midlife crisis).

The point here is that the constant suppression of identity is reflected in the integrity of the individual. Constant self-control and response to the mood of others is hard, exhausting work that takes a lot of energy and leads to stress and depression. But restoring an oppressed identity is no easy task either. Many such experiences are perceived exclusively negatively, which is fundamentally wrong.

Most often, the reunion with the “shadow” self occurs according to the following pattern: “I tried to remake myself, become what others wanted me to be, did not do what I wanted, and missed the best moments in life.” And it's hard to argue with that, though Do not forget that self-respect is the same part of the personality.

Therefore, whatever life you have lived, it is yours, just as the future life will be yours. Recognizing and comprehending your mistakes, one should not regret the lost, but seek strength for new achievements. The right attitude when finding one's identity is a motivator for self-discovery, a source of energy for the realization of new ideas, a way to give impetus to the imagination and find an answer to the question of who a person is and who he really wants to become.

To recognize the problem is to half solve it

In the specialized literature, you can find various ways and methods for gaining one's identity. It is recommended to keep a diary, write letters to yourself, both in the future and in the past.

If there is a family, be sure to discuss the feelings, fears and anxieties that arise. Look for solutions together, gradually becoming like-minded people again, helping both yourself and your partner to understand your and his inner world, to realize the life path you have traveled, to outline the milestones of the future path.“Expand” consciousness, learn to look at familiar things from the outside, rediscovering their essence.published

Natalia291

Hello. A few years ago, I began to notice long periods of depression and apathy, as well as constant proximity to tears, although there were no special reasons for this. But then this state then disappeared, then appeared again. I never considered myself a cheerful person, but the last few months have just become very hard. The feeling that something is rolling in, and at these moments one feels wild despair and hopelessness, my whole life seems meaningless. Then everything is replaced by a feeling of some inner emptiness. And I lost interest in the hobby that used to help me, it is very painful. I try to understand myself, but in the end I drive myself into a corner even more ... Thanks in advance.

Hello Natalia291! Tell us more about yourself: how old are you, what do you do, do you live alone or with a family? What happened in your life Lately What could affect the mood, how do you think? Have you faced Last year or two with serious losses? Perhaps you had to go through some shocks, illness or death of loved ones, parting with significant person, loss of work, friends, property?

You mentioned a hobby: could you tell us more about it? What were you into before?

Natalia291

Thanks for answering. I am 41 and not married. I live with a teenage daughter, an adult son, lives separately. I cannot say that I have experienced any serious shocks or disappointment lately. The feeling of such a light sadness was always present and even helped me sometimes in my hobby. I write poetry, or rather wrote until recently. It helped me a lot, but now there is some kind of ambiguity in my head, my thoughts seem to be scattered. I want to write something, I feel that it will become easier, but I realize that everything has become indifferent to me, I have no strength, no desire. And that makes it even harder.

Natalia291, of course, you are quite an adult and accomplished person, you have raised two children. What is your profession, education? Are you working now? Are you satisfied with your work? Do you have a personal life, how satisfied are you with what happens in it?
What is the relationship with the adult son? With a teenage daughter? Who is in your inner circle? Are your parents alive, do you communicate with them? Is there any contact with the father or fathers of the children? Do they help you financially? How would you rate the quality of your life on the following parameters (from 0 to 10)

Professional life, relationships with colleagues
- Life and home
- Finance
- Relationships with family members
- Personal life,
- Relationships with friends
- Creativity, self-realization
- Recreation, entertainment, leisure
- Spiritual life, education

Natalia291

Unfortunately, I never received a special education (I got married early). As I understand now, I never loved my husband, I just wanted to take revenge on my young man. We did not have a close relationship with him, but I loved him madly. She separated from her husband shortly after the birth of her son. It was a mutual decision, because there was nothing but constant scandals. He neither communicated with his son, nor participated in his upbringing. There were problems with my son both in childhood and adolescence, now everything is more or less calm. When I was already divorced and raised my son alone, a person appeared in my life again, whom I could not forget and for whose sake I decided to marry, stupidly, to spite him. He reciprocated, I was happy until the moment I got pregnant. Then he offered to have an abortion, I refused, and we broke up.

He was categorically against the child. But I have never in my life regretted for a second that I made a choice in favor of a child. That's how I got my daughter. Since then, there have been no relationships in my life, but I don’t need anything anymore. Everything has its time. Her father never even saw her daughter, we live in the same city, sometimes we collide, trying not to make eye contact. At the moment, I work part-time as a cleaner, my health does not allow it in a different way (problems with my legs). Relations with my parents are strained, as it always has been. Everything as usual...

Natalia291, it becomes sad from your story: it seems that you had to deal with a sense of betrayal from a close man. Whatever circumstances may have served as the reason for his unwillingness to have your joint child, he is responsible for the birth of a new life, and your daughter is not to blame for anything with him, she does not deserve such an attitude from her own father. I can only try to imagine how many different hard feelings you have for a person who has been the center of your emotional life for a long time, and because of whom you made the most important decisions for you and your destiny.

And given the fact that you continue to live with this person in the same city and regularly receive a living reminder of these difficult feelings, it is not surprising that you can constantly feel a depressive state. You write that after you broke up with your daughter's father, you were no longer interested in men. As far as I understand, the girl is now 12-15 years old, which means that you stopped all attempts to experience personal happiness and satisfaction when you were not yet 30 years old. You are still quite a young woman who can live her life not only in caring for a child, but also in love with a man. However, your choice was different. I suppose that you could not survive that story with the main man of your life until today, who brought you so much pain. While it was necessary for you to deal with survival and raise children, you did not give yourself the opportunity to give time and attention to your feelings and needs. The maternal instinct is capable of much, so it helped you to avoid touching your spiritual wounds. However, now the children have grown up, the son began to live an independent life, the daughter is on the verge of growing up. Those vital tasks that you have devoted yourself to solving are gradually being realized, and the moment is not far off when the need to be only a caring mother for your children will cease to be so acute. Inevitably, you feel it, and legitimate questions about the new meaning of your life may appear in your soul. It's perfect natural process. All people whose children grow up feel something similar. Thoughts about the future can be unsettling, especially if you feel that children and caring for them have occupied almost the entire space of your life. Perhaps you are very worried about the appearance of emptiness and the inability to fill it in the usual way. This is very similar to the signs of one of the age crises, given your family situation.

Many people go through such crises, Natalya, and enter a new stage and acquire a new meaning and a sense of fulfillment. To do this, of course, you have to carry out difficult mental work. In your situation, I would suggest that you think about the fact that this stage can bring you much more freedom than ever before in your life. You never had time for yourself. And now it's starting to show up. You decide how to dispose of them. A lot can still happen for you: your favorite business, and new acquaintances, and close relationships and creative realization. You have done the main thing in your life: you raised two children alone, you are a very strong woman who is capable of much. Maybe you will give yourself permission to live for yourself, listening carefully to your feelings, needs, desires, moods .. This may not be easy at first, because you do not have such a habit. But as you observe yourself and allow yourself these new sensations, you can begin to taste life in a new way. You can come to unexpected discoveries, you can discover facets and sides that are completely unexpected for yourself. I really wish you, Natalia, that you become truly interested in yourself, begin to get to know yourself, explore yourself. I am convinced that this can become the most exciting page of your life.

Natalia291

Thank you very much for the answer. You are right, you need to rethink your life, find something new for yourself, but for some reason it seems impossible to me. The reality is that the time has passed, I know that I have grown old and look terrible. I can’t even imagine a stranger, an outsider man in my life, and I really can’t be with another man. I understood this a long time ago, because a couple of times there were earlier attempts, but without my initiative. For some reason, even the memory of it makes me sick. I understand now that I loved perhaps not a person, but an image that I invented for myself. But I write poems based only on these feelings and experiences. Many times I tried to write something positive, but I already gave up these attempts. Also, obsessive actions began to manifest themselves more strongly, before I could somehow control them, but now it is impossible. There was a need to carry out these rituals not only at home, but also at work. People probably already notice and think I'm crazy. If you haven't noticed it yet, it's just a matter of time. I hate myself for my weakness and inability to cope with this. Plus, this insomnia ... I don’t want my daughter to see me in this state, she is already an adult, she is almost 15. Perhaps I am winding myself up, there is no one to blame but myself. You just have to learn to live in this situation.

We can continue the consultation here, but I believe that this will not be enough for you: you need live communication and regular support for your efforts to find new meaning.

Natalia291

Natalia291, you can continue our topic with you as soon as you feel the need. From what I would recommend you do for yourself now:

It is important to give yourself small pleasures every day. You can list at least five points of what brings you relaxation, pleasure, creates good mood? Do it right now, in this thread, please list. Let's see together what you could do more often.

Could you tell us with whom, besides your daughter and son, do you like to communicate, at least sometimes? Who could support you in difficult times? With whom are you just ready to have a good time for yourself?

Writing poetry, as I felt, is a very great resource for you, including a way to throw out your experiences and emotions. In my opinion, there is nothing wrong with the fact that there is a lot of sadness in your poems: in this way you give this sadness an outlet and alleviate your state of mind.

If you are ready to talk about the rituals that you mentioned, we can try to investigate this issue as well.

Natalia291

I thought for a long time on what five points should I focus on and realized that at the moment I can’t name more than one. Now there is nothing that would bring joy or pleasure. It is also impossible to relax yet, there is always some kind of internal tension. For many years I have noticed a habit of bending my fingers into a fist. If someone tells me about it, or friends try to joke about it, I feel very embarrassed and I also try to laugh it off in response. Well, I just feel more comfortable and sometimes I don’t immediately notice it. Previously, there was a person with whom I could have a heart-to-heart talk, this is my girlfriend, with whom we have not seen each other for a long time, but now we have moved away from each other, everyone has their own life, no one is to blame for this. But a friend came up (we work together), and somehow by chance she mentioned a problem similar to mine and we talked a little about it. At that moment, I felt a little better.

Natalia291, what could bring you joy and pleasure? What did you like to do before when you did not notice such serious tension?

About a friend: maybe she misses you too?
As for a new acquaintance: do you have a desire to get to know her a little better?

Natalia291

I used to get pleasure from poetry, I have been writing since childhood, and it was always probably the only thing that brought real joy. Now I really can probably rejoice for the success of my daughter, for the fact that she is not like me. She is very active, participates in various competitions and events, she has many friends. My girlfriend and I were in close contact when both were single at that time, we have sons of the same age. She was always aware of my problems and relationships, we absolutely trusted each other, and now, I think, nothing would have changed. We do not communicate, but from this we did not become different people. She was the only one of all who supported me in the decision to give birth to a second child, when everyone around categorically did not approve of this. We very rarely see each other, but when it does, I feel that nothing has changed over the years, I can also completely trust her. I feel sympathy for my new acquaintance as a person who trusts me and shares something with me. Perhaps we can become friends in the future, I would like this.

Natalia291, what do you think, with what eyes does your daughter look at you? Usually girls take a model of life behavior by looking at their mother. Do you think she can be proud of you? What will you answer her questions about men, about how to choose them, how to build relationships with them? Is it important to you to be a support for your daughter on her way of growing up? What do you think about what it's like to be a child next to a mother who is depressed?

Natalia291

It hurts. Realize that you have never been and never will be an example for your daughter. Of course, in dealing with her, I try to hide my condition as much as possible. I always ask how things are going, what's new at school. Whenever possible, I try to let her know that I care about what happens to her and how important she is to me. Of course, when she was younger, we talked more with her, but now, I think, due to the fact that she is this old, she has become more secretive. There was no question about men yet, I do not want to think about it, although I understand that this is necessary. Again, I am very glad that she is not like me. At her age, I was an outcast. I can’t evaluate myself from the outside right now, but I will do my best so that she does not see me the way I feel inside.

How to get out of the state when everything is lazy and you don’t want to do anything? I don’t want anything, and the thought of any action causes melancholy and seems meaningless. What to do, how to keep/create motivation for action?
Depends on the specific situation. A situation on the verge of clinical always requires detailed professional assessment psychotherapist.
Do, not think. Think we are all artists! But to create something - zero will, a dead character, passivity in relation to goals. Such people have nothing to do in the modern world, running to a psychologist - and five years of self-satisfaction in soul-searching along with him. How much can you love yourself so desperately? Well, what are you like to love yourself like that?

What is a motive, where does it come from, and can you create it yourself? How are motives related, if related, to a person's age?
The mechanical man is associated with age. Some motives are created by the person himself, others are created by his karma.
If a person owns the time line, he himself creates both himself in the future time and any motivation, increasing positive karma there. You need a goal in the future, a powerful goal, to reverse the influence of karma, which is always on the timeline in the past. The present is the point of change. Decide for yourself now and as specifically as possible: what strong dream, goal or business you want to see in your future, what you will do for this, and all the negative karma of the past will disappear with time.

How to overcome infantilism? What specifically hinders totality in self-development? What is superficiality - in the absence of strong motivation? How to realize and understand, for example, that you are engaged in self-deception and do not really want to change anything?
Blah blah blah. Inward mumbling has never yet overcome anything. What I see here is boundless self-love and an unwillingness to get off your ass and do something with your life. Do it, don't think about it!
/ R.I. Popov 100 questions.

Senseless activity, that is, activity that has no meaning, has an extremely negative effect on the mental state of a person, which has been proven by a number of psychological experiments, and which we ourselves can observe. It is enough to look at a person whose activity does not make sense, and you will see how dead a person is, whose behavior is sometimes similar to that of a robot. A person who sees the meaning in what he does, pursuing a certain goal, looks much fresher, more cheerful and his mental state is more balanced, in other words, a person lives. As an example, I can cite one interesting experiment that I read about at one time. It was an experiment on prisoners who built railway, their work was very hard and therefore some of them died. But then for the experiment they were forced to drag stones from one place to another, that is, their activity became absolutely meaningless, and the mortality rate doubled. Thus, we see that a person engaged in meaningless activities ceases to cling to life than if he were clearly convinced of the need for his actions.

In fact this kind There have been many experiments, but I like to give more examples from life, in which there are plenty of such experiments, you just need to be careful. Pay attention to the children, or remember yourself as a child, remember your dreams, the amount of energy that you had, that cheerfulness and determination that adults have on a completely different level. And here, my friends, it’s not about age, I assure you, it’s all about energy, in the scale of human activity, which is suppressed in our society, in order to subjugate the will of a person. A person full of enthusiasm, creatively looking at his life, having a lot of ideas and energy for their implementation, is practically unmanageable, he asks questions, sometimes very uncomfortable for others, he tries to see the meaning in where there is none, and this prevents him from exploiting . In general, of course, there is a meaning in everything, if you look for it, you will definitely find it, but this meaning can have a different scale of significance.

There is, for example, a sense in the life of a fly, which is food for birds, that is, it occupies a certain position in the food chain, and this is its category. The category of significance of a person and the meaning of his life is an order of magnitude higher, and therefore everything below this category seems meaningless to a person and from a psychic point of view - it kills him. Why, let's say, people are afraid of free time, because they do not see the point in it, a normal and healthy person in all respects cannot do nothing, he did not come into this world for that. And therefore, we all subconsciously, and someone at the level of consciousness, understand this, we understand that our task is to do something that makes sense, that justifies our life. I will not analyze the lives of people who are apathetic and who absolutely do not need anything, ready to lie around for days and do nothing, primarily because I consider such people dead in terms of the state of their inner world, and then they also have a certain meaning , an example for others.

A normal person should see the meaning of his life and the meaning of his activity, which I propose to supplement with a specific goal in life, which should be as significant as possible. This will allow the joy of life to receive and have more energy, sometimes overflowing. I saw people who were fanatically obsessed with their idea, who had a lot of energy, who made plans, looked for opportunities to realize their idea and were not afraid of anything. And for sure, each of you also met such people in your life, moreover, we all felt the same way at least once, and some, including me, feel the same way at the moment. A person who sees meaning in his life and his affairs will live longer and have more health than someone who lives a meaningless life and engages in meaningless activities. And this is not a theory that I came to, but a pattern that you can personally observe by looking closely at the lives of people, as I call it, paying attention to those who live their whole lives in such a way that they constantly strive for something.

Well, a person will not have a desire to do anything if this activity is not given meaning, which is why competent leaders always give meaning to the activities of their subordinates. For the same purpose, they find an enemy for society, with whom everyone is fighting, for the same reason they hold a carrot in front of people's noses different colors, then red, as it was with our country, then green, which is happening now with the whole world. Meaning is activity with the thought of what I am doing and why do I need it? And such a thought can be controlled, or you can turn it off, which is less effective, as we see, although people become more submissive. This happens because a person engaged in meaningless activities has a very low self-esteem, in addition to enthusiasm and energy, because if he does something that he does not see the point in, then in fact he does it without desire, which means he commits violence against himself. You see what a chain of internal state is revealed to us if we analyze with you the meaningless type of human activity, and all this can be controlled and managed.

You can manage your condition yourself, increase or decrease your energy, mood, self-confidence. After all, if you think and find meaning in what you are doing at the moment, then it’s like drinking a life elixir that will give you vitality, self-confidence, increase your energy, make your life more joyful and so on, in general, a complete positive. If possible, it is better, of course, to really do necessary things, but since it so happened that you yourself or by the will of other people, you are forced to engage in meaningless activities, then persistently look for meaning in this or betray it to yourself, because it exists and you need to imagine it. This will save you, you will not die as a person, you will feel like a person, and remain enthusiastic no matter what.

For example, I will say that in this way I have cured many from depression and helped to achieve significant success in life, simply by helping to find meaning in everything that is in a person’s life, including his activities. So, my friends, this is really important, there is a lot of senseless activity around us, our society is built that way, in which a person sometimes performs the functions of a machine that simply has to obey commands from outside, and not take the initiative and think with his own head. But we are not like you by nature. We are creators, and we must see the act of creation in everything we do, remember, there is a meaning in everything, look for it, if necessary, give it significance decent life person. And ideally, of course, do not engage in meaningless activities, do not lower yourself to the level of a fly or a branch of a tree that you can scratch your back on.

Do something in life that actually makes sense, gives practical results and, above all, makes your life better. The more creative activity you choose for yourself, the more ambitious your plans, the happier your life will be. Set goals that make sense, and even if you cannot achieve all these goals, the very process of achieving it will make sense for you, this is life, joyful, happy, dynamic, a life worthy of a person, a life with meaning.